SuperMom

I'm telling you ladies, these Tuesday night videos are really helping me up my game.  I don't want to brag but I have turned into SuperMom. See my conversation with my three year old as proof:

Me: I need you to use this bowl this morning not the white one. Your brother needs the white one so he won't knock it over and spill it. 

Him: But I waaaaaaannnnnnt it.

Me: (Ignore) Who can be a big boy for me this morning and use the blue bowl?

Him: But I waaaaaaaannnnnt it.

Me: I heard you say that already and the answer is no. Is there something else you would like to tell me?

Him: But I waaaaaaannnnnt it.

Me: It sounds like you are talking yucky to Mommy. Would you like a do-over and try to talk nice to Mommy all by yourself, or do you need some help to think of sweet words?

Him: Do-over. 

Me: Thank you. That is a good choice. 

So, smooth right? And let me tell you that when I was typing the conversation just now it was really difficulty to mimic the whine and screeching particularly with the word WWWAAAAANNNNTTTT. And yet I stayed cool as a cucumber.

Alright. Alright. So if I'm being completely forthcoming that conversation happened last Wednesday morning, but by Thursday morning my responses were more like this:

Me: WE ARE NOT DOING THIS TODAY!!!!!!!! YOU ARE BEING A GROUCH!!!!! I ALREADY SAID NO!!!!!!

Yeah, not as smooth. Apparently the videos tend to wear off after 24 hours. Good thing there is another one tomorrow night so I can re-charge.  See you tomorrow night!

Frozen

Have you heard the song from Frozen yet. I know, I know. Before you start groaning, I'm not talking about that song. Sheesh don't freak out on me,  let it go:) I'm talking about this one.

"We aren't saying you can change him

'Cause people don't really change

We're only saying that love's a force that's powerful and strange

People make bad choices if they're mad or scared or stressed

But throw a little love their way, and you'll bring out their best

Everyone's a bit of a fixer upper

That's what it's all about

Father, Sister, Brother

We need each other

To raise us up and round us out

Everyone's a bit of a fixer upper

But when the push comes to shove

The only fixer upper 

That can fix a fixer upper is

True 

True

True

True 

Love

Now don't go dissecting my song choice here, I don't think love is enough when it comes to adoption. But I will say that my husband and I are in the midst of some struggles with one of our boys right now and I think he could use some extra love thrown his way (except what I really want to give is longer time outs, the cold shoulder, and some harsh lectures).

"People make bad choices if they're mad or scared or stressed, 

But throw a little love their way and you'll bring out their best."

 It's like Karyn Purvys wrote those lyrics herself. Well, either her or Jesus.  And I love how the song  goes on to say that everyone is a fixer-upper. Preach! So so true. Last Tuesday night's discussion after the video was a testament to that. There were so many brave stories shared from foster/adoptive parents who are floundering as we try to re-parent the wrongs that have been done to our kids. And so many knowing nods from around the room. This stuff is no joke.  I think we can all agree that nothing has humbled us or showcased our weaknesses as much as this foster/adopt adventure we're all on.

My name is Christina, I am a struggling adoptive momma and a fixer-upper just like you. Come join our fixer-upper support club on Tuesday nights.  Four more weeks left and then it all culminates on Friday night,  May 16th,  with a dinner and conference.

Click Here for information concerning THRIVE'S David & Jayne Schooler Dinner Conference on May 16!

Going through the motions

I have two kindergarteners this year and for homework they are supposed to read (or be read to) for 10 minutes. This sounds totally easy right, 10 minutes a night? IT IS SOOO NOT! First of all that's 10 minutes a night times 2 children which makes it 20 minutes a night. It might as well be impossible at that point. Because do you know what my 2 year old can do in 20 minutes while his mother is distracted by educating his brothers?? The horror.

So a few months into the school year I got smart and realized that if Seth (who is an independent reader) read a book to Judah for 10 minutes, then we could get this task checked off no problem.

Look closely and you can see the kindergartner on the floor reading aloud. Now move to the kindergartener on the couch who is supposedly being read to. Yes that's an iPad in his lap and, yes he is looking at the TV.  Reading homework? Nailed it.

Not really though, huh? What their teacher assigned in small increments for the purpose of learning and advancing throughout the year, our family has totally failed at and we are just going through the motions.

I get like that in parenting sometimes too. The daily grind and repetition of working, cooking, cleaning, laundry, homework, practice, diaper changes, breaking up fights, "don't talk to your brother like that," and "why are you crying (again)?"...  it wears me down. I start going through the motions of parenting, but my heart is not in it. For me that means I become reactive instead of pro-active. And with three adopted boys who have come from a hard place they need more than a mom who is faking it.

That's what I loved about the Care RX:video last Tuesday at Fellowship. It was a chance to re-focus and remember the bigger picture of where our foster/adoptive kiddos are coming from and the awesome task we have at hand. The point is not to check them off as an assignment that needs to be  "completed" but to dive in every day with all that we've got. And then rinse and repeat the next day.

I hope you'll join us tomorrow night.

And see tuned below for some other upcoming events hosted by different churches and organizations in our community.

Upcoming Events

Only two more days until our next chance to refuel and network with other foster/adoptive moms. Our clan plans on being there. Pretty much if it advertises FREE CHILD CARE the Jones Family will be there. 

(What's that you said? There is an event where we get to watch paint dry, scrub toilets with toothbrushes, and clip other people's toe nails, while The Wiggles songs cycle in the background over and over..... but there will be free child care? I'm in.)

Let's Build Our Village

Hey Mommas!

I'm Christina AKA the sucker who raised my hand at the meeting and volunteered to get our support community going. Nice to meet you. :)  I'm a mom to six boys, three bio and three adopted. Our family moved to Little Rock about a year and a half ago and I have been on the hunt for an adoption community ever since. This blog will be a hub to showcase guest posts, advertise upcoming local events,  recommend adoption resources, and share all our parenting tips, tricks and failures.

Because let's face it, it takes a village right? So let's build one.

One of my favorite things to do is read adoption blogs. And so I thought we could start by sharing our favorites. If you have a blog that you love to read and especially if you have one that you author please sound off in the comments. Here are a few that I love:

www.rebekahpinchback.blogspot.com
Rebekah writes about open adoption, faith, infertility, and foster care among many things. She has two adopted sons and recently opened her home to a brother and sister.

http://jenhatmaker.com/blog.htm
Jen is a popular author and speaker. Mom to three bio kids and two adopted children from an international adoption. Her "after the airport series" was so spot on for our family. And her sense of humor is laugh out loud.

http://putdowntheurinalcake.com
Beth is a hilarious Momma to five kids, 3 adopted and a surprise set of bio twins. She is honest about not having it all together. She blogs about family life, faith, and her messy house.

http://fullplatemom.com
Is just what it sounds, it follows the life of a busy momma to 9 kids. With her plethora of experience she highlights trans-racial adoption, sibling adoption, special needs, and international adoption.

www.thegreatdisturbance.wordpress.com
Cory is a local preacher whose good looks rival any hollywood actor and whose wit is stand-up worthy. Oh yeah, and he's also my husband. His blog chronicled his life as a stay at home dad to 6 boys (all under the age of 8) and his adventures with the foster care system.

www.christina-jones.blogspot.com
The place I go to for free therapy. This is my personal blog where I work through my faith, show off my family, and let the sarcasm flow.


Ok Mommas, don't leave me hanging as the only carpenter in this village. Come build with me.

Sound off in the comments.